Where Has My Libido Gone?
Q: I can't seem to get in the mood anymore, I find this really sad as I am only 19! I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half and he's getting so stressed.
I love him dearly, he's really drop dead sexy and he's great in bed! I just can’t get in the mood though. I know it's nothing he's done but I can’t seem to work it out!
I have recently had a fairly major operation and am about to have another. I was on medication whilst this was happening and my body didn't agree with it dropping my libido to nearly nothing, giving me a period for months, making me feel ill and giving me headaches. I've been back on the pill for 3 months now and no change in libido. Everything else has gone back to normal though. I know I had a lot of stressful things happening to me lately but I just don't know if that is the underlining problem.
Any ideas??
A: When your sex life drops away inexplicably and quite suddenly, there is usually a specific reason for it. You obviously liked sex before so there's nothing wrong with you physically or psychologically in an ongoing way. If you can trace back to where it started you should begin to get an idea of what the reason is for your low libido. Although I think you’ll find that stress may be your answer!
Stress can prevent us from getting “in the mood”. With the libido-dampening effects of excessive stress, sex sometimes goes by the wayside. And let’s remember that stress isn’t just limited to our emotions. Your body has been through some major stress lately and this can inadvertently have a massive effective on your libido – without you even knowing! Starting with outside the bedroom and moving in, here are some quick tips on how to get in the mood, so you can enjoy the benefits of sex!
1. Eat a healthy diet - A healthy, balanced diet with plenty of vegetables, protein and whole foods can actually reduce your stress level, increase your energy, and help your body look and feel better.
2. Exercise - exercise gives you more energy, and even 20 minutes three times a week can make a big difference in your energy level and overall health.
3. Reduce Obligations In Your Life - If you get organized, prioritize only important commitments in your life and say no to other activities that take up your time, you can reduce the overall level of stress you experience in your life, and you’ll have more time and energy on your hands and will be less stressed.
4. Get enough sleep - Sleep deprivation can wreak havoc on your entire system and make you feel more stressed.
5. Have a good laugh! - It’s often said that laughter is the shortest distance between two people. Laughter is also an excellent stress reliever and delivers great benefits to your body and soul. Try to unwind with a funny T.V. show or book, or make it a point to share some laughs with the one you love.
6. Set the mood – I know it sounds a little corny, but try dimming the lights, playing your favourite music, giving each other a massage, anything that will start getting you both relaxed and in the mood for romance!
Good luck!
